


Under Wraps

by Onlymostydead



Category: DCU, DCU (Comics), Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Background Zatanna Zatara/Artemis Crock, Blood, Confessions of love, Disordered Eating, Dysphoria, Fluff, Friendly banter, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Misgendering, Pining, Self-Harm, Trans Artemis Crock, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Trans Wally West, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 14:27:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19465894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onlymostydead/pseuds/Onlymostydead
Summary: Wally West has problems of his own, yeah, who doesn't? But the team matters more than that. They need him to be the lovable goofball they've all come to rely upon for a laugh.So as long as his problems are hidden under his costume he's good... Right?And as long as he can keep his crush on Robin under control, too...





	Under Wraps

**Author's Note:**

> Additional trigger warning that didn't fit as a tag: there's a suicide/suicide attempt mentioned on a tv show they're watching within the fic. 
> 
> Please re-read the tags, don't hurt yourself.

Wally raked a hand through his greasy hair, curls falling down into his eyes. He looked like shit, and it wasn't just his low self esteem; he legitimately looked terrible. Dark circles sat under his puffy eyes, making it look like he hadn't slept in a week. He had lost a little bit of weight over the weekend, and he definitely couldn't afford to lose those pounds.

But those things weren't really visible through the costume, right? 

As long as his friends couldn't see, Wally was fine. Because the team... The team needed him to be strong. Not in the same way Kaldur or Robin were strong, but it was the same.

They needed him to be constant.

Pushing his hand through his hair again, he tried to get it to stay back a little bit. Smile. Pushing back everything weighing on him. Standing up straighter, never looking afraid to fall. Always cracking bad jokes, pick up lines, anything to pester a reaction out of Artemis.

Because that was Kid Flash, and that's what they needed him for. A little comic relief. A laugh... Or at least a chuckle.

Because things were tense enough right now without him complaining about what he was dealing with.

Because M'gann was still getting used to them knowing she was a White Martian, even though it had been a little while. And working out who he is was always a constant battle for Connor. Artemis had her problems at home, and with her dad. Robin was being overworked in Gotham and rarely had much energy around them, anymore. Zatanna's dad died, for fuck's sake. Raquel was still struggling to find her place on the team, and Kaldur was trying his best to hold them all together in spite of all that.

But as long as nothing was visible when he had his costume on, it was all fine.

Wally slapped on a little concealer under his eyes, smiled again to try to convince himself it was normal, then stepped out into HQ.

***

"Wow, you're awful chipper this morning." Artemis glared, taking a sip from her coffee. "Is your costume always that bright?"

"I mean, I could turn it to stealth mode if you like, Blondie." Wally grinned, tapping his chest. "A little easier on your eyes?"

"Nope. Your face is still awful to look at."

"Aww, you know you love it, Blondie."

She scoffed, ruffling his hair. "In your dreams, Wally."

"Nightmares, actually." He tapped his chest again, back into normal costume. "You? In love with me?"

"Unless a lot of things changed, not gonna happen." Artemis pointed out dryly, taking another swig of coffee. 

"Like what?"

"My sexuality."

"Oh, yeah..." Wally nodded, playing dumb. "Is it bad I forgot you're a lesbian?"

"Probably." Zatanna yawned as she walked into the kitchen, pressing a quick kiss to Artemis's cheek before getting breakfast. "She is really gay, after all."

She nodded, glancing over at Wally. "Gayer than you are, miraculously."

"I don't know, I'm pretty gay."

"And you're both into cute bisexuals with black hair, strange verbal tics, and a penchant for tight or revealing clothing." Zatanna added. "What a coincidence."

Artemis rolled her eyes, a smile tugging at her lips. Wally turned red, sputtering.

"Just because I'm gay, doesn't mean I have a crush on Robin!"

"Uh huh." She smiled. "Good luck with that."

***

It wasn't the gay thing Wally had a hard time with. His attraction to men was easy. It had always been there; there was no big discovery moment, no major realization. 

The only thing that threw a wrench into the ease of things was being trans.

At first he pretended to be into girls, so he'd seem more masculine to the team, but they didn't buy that for a moment. Besides, it started to make M'gann uncomfortable, and he couldn't stand that. It wasn't cute, it wasn't cool, and it definitely wasn't working the way he wanted it to, anyway. So he dropped it.

It hadn't been until recently, though, that he actually told the team he was a trans guy. That had been simple enough, and when it gave Artemis the security to come out as a trans girl, he couldn't be any more proud.

Being gay? That was easy for him. Because gay didn't show on the outside. It showed in how he talked only because of stereotypes, and how he dressed by the same.

But being trans...

No matter where he was in life, it seemed like he couldn't catch a break in the mirror. His body was good. It was strong. But he couldn't help but see all the things wrong with it through his suit. Long legs with slight but noticeable hips and a dainty waist. 

But as long as he wore a binder under his suit, he was fine. As long as his chest didn't show through, he could live with everything else. It didn't matter that wasn't good for him; it was just how it was.

The world just didn't need to know.

***

"Hey Walls, what's up?" Robin asked, casually draping himself over the back of the couch.

"Nothin' much, what's up with you, Rob?" Wally tipped his head up to look at him, trying to keep calm.

But did Robin have to be so cute? It wasn't fair. They had been friends for so many years, and they had been through so much together, but this stupid crush just wouldn't quit. This summer all of a sudden he couldn't stop noticing the pretty curve of Rob's lips, or how strong his jawline had gotten, or how nice his cheekbones were. Every time he noticed particularly his mask, or those sunglasses, he couldn't help but wonder what the eyes underneath looked like.

Personally, he liked to imagine them being a dark, chocolaty brown. They would be warm and tender, but he could also see the mischievous glint they would get whenever he had a prank on his mind. That would be-

A hand was being waved in front of his face. "You alright, KF?"

"What?"

Robin was laughing. "You really spaced out there for a moment, huh? What were you thinking about?"

"Yeah... Nothing, really." He shrugged, color creeping onto his face. "You know how my thoughts work, Robbie."

"Or don't work. Need a moment to get whelmed?"

"Nope. I'm good."

"Then Mario Kart?"

"Just the two of us?" Wally asked, secretly hoping it would be. "I mean, I could grab someone else, but I think they're all busy..."

"Really?" Robin raised an eyebrow. "What're they doing?"

Shit. Now he was going to have to remember? "Well, Connor's out with Wolf."

"Yeah," He agreed.

"And M'gann was going to teach Raquel that brownie recipe, the super fudge one? Fuck, I love that recipe."

"Alright, Walls, on topic." Robin snickered.

"And Kaldur... To be honest, I just haven't seen him, and at this point I'm just going to assume he needs a little time to himself. Self care. He deserves it."

"Yeah, that's definitely fair."

"And Artemis and Zatanna are..." This is where Wally didn't know... "Canoodling."

Robin snorted. "What?"

"They're canoodling." He stated again, crossing his arms and nodding. "Very busy. Wouldn't want to interrupt something like that."

"You know what KF? I love you. Now, let's go play some Mario Kart."

***

Wally's dad had gotten drunk again last night. 

It wasn't so bad, he tried to convince himself. Other people had it much worse than him. Artemis's dad was a supervillain, for fuck's sake.

Because when Rudolph West was sober, he loved his 'daughter.' He shamed 'her' for eating so much and made sure 'her' short hair wasn't because 'she thought she was a boy,' but he loved her. He really did.

But when he was drunk? That was a different thing entirely. He just... Needed someone to take his anger out on. That was all it was.

Nothing personal. He loved 'her.'

But the bruises were hidden under the costume, so none of it mattered.

***

It was team movie night, which tonight meant that no one could agree on a movie. Normally they could at least come to a little bit of agreement, but this time? Nope, no one had any intention of watching what the others wanted to watch. 

Which, Wally knew no one would want to watch his pick, except maybe Robin. Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure was an odd one, to be certain.

But Robin wanted to watch Arsenic and Old Lace, which was funny, yeah, but it was also ancient and Wally was not here for that. Zatanna wanted to watch Jane Eyre, but no one else wanted to cry so that wouldn't work; and Raquel wanted to watch Star Wars, and Connor wanted to watch a movie that wasn't in a language that any of them spoke, he just liked the pictures-

That pretty much painted the picture.

Which is what ended up with them all crowded on the couches, eating the super fudge brownies Raquel and M'gann made, watching a show Wally didn't recognize. They didn't agree on it; it had just been playing on the TV, so they decided to give it a shot. 

It was a little weird, and a little graphic, but that was fine. Their lives were too, weren't they? And besides, they were barely watching the show, since every commercial break-

Artemis rolled her eyes. "Robin, if you don't hand over the popcorn, I swear-"

"You swear what?" Robin grinned, tossing another piece of popcorn into Wally's mouth.

He caught it perfectly. So far he only missed one, and that didn't count because Connor bumped him.

"I swear I'll-"

Zatanna sighed, cutting her off. "Ereh emoc lwob."

The bowl moved from Robin's hands over to Zatanna, where she took it, settled back into the couch, and fed a piece to Artemis.

Wally rolled his eyes. "Alright. Artemis and Zatanna one, Robin and Wally zero."

"Wait. Team name?" Artemis glanced over at Zatanna. "Because I say we're team..."

She whispered something in her ear.

"Wait, Robbie." Wally turned, getting as close as he could to his face without feeling like he was going to spontaneously combust, forming an impromptu huddle. "Team name?"

"Uh... Hmm..." Robin frowned, brows furrowing. "Rally."

"Rally? That's awful."

"Well, it's better than Wobin, that's for sure."

"Well, yeah," Wally agreed. "Come on, though! You're the smart one."

"We just need to keep whelmed about this... How about... Birdflash?"

"Yeah! Birdflash!"

"Alright." Robin announced, pulling away from their little huddle. "We have our team name."

"And we have ours." Artemis declared. "Snaibsel."

"What?"

"It's lesbians backwards." Zatanna explained. "I'm bi, but 'wlw' is the same backward and forward, so..."

"Yeah, that makes sense." Wally agreed. "And we're birdflash!"

"Self explanatory, cool." Artemis shrugged. "Snaibsel one, birdflash zero."

"Shh!" M'gann shushed them. "The commercial break is over, and I want to know if the girl is really dead or not!"

***

Wally ran back to his room during the commercial break after that, feeling almost like he couldn't breathe. The show, something in it- 

It just got-

He didn't know why it triggered such a response from him. The blood was clearly fake, and the girl didn't actually slit her wrists, but if still made Wally feel the need. 

It was stupid. He had so many friends. He had an aunt and uncle, parents who loved him, friends who would die for him, a world that he had helped save countless times over, and yet...

Sometimes he just wanted to bleed.

Only on really bad days, when dysphoria was kicking his ass and his dad had gotten drunk the night before... At least at first, those were the only times. Now it was starting to feel like every day. He wanted to see himself bleed, and to be honest? It scared him.

But as long as the cuts were concealed by the costume, by what he wore, he was good. 

Wally stripped out of his costume in an instant, leaving him standing there in just his boxer briefs and his binder. Now, to find his blade...

It was too dull to cause any real kind of damage, but the cheap pencil sharpener had one advantage: it was discrete. The team would question why he had a pocketknife, or actual razor blades, of a box cutter, but this? It was innocuous. No one would guess it.

And if he kept up the act, kept pretending, no one would guess him, either.

Unscrewing the pencil sharpener, Wally removed the blade, twisting the inner thigh of his left leg toward him. There weren't many scars in the area, after all; it would still hurt. Spots on his outer thighs had already gotten too scarred up, too well covered, but this...

This was still delicate. Still sensitive 

Still soft.

He didn't want to be soft anymore, he thought to himself as he pictured the girl in the TV show, what her body had looked like laid out on that bathroom floor. Everything about that shot was set up to make her look tragic and pretty and feminine and all of these things he was trying so desperately not to be.

He was just real.

Not beautiful.

Not tragic.

Not soft.

Real and bloody and hurting.

This was just his way of holding together. He didn't know why, or why it worked, or why he really started doing this, only that he did it.

When Wally was satisfied with the thin cuts already healing on his inner thighs he wiped off the blade on his boxer briefs - they were already bloody - screwed it back into the pencil sharpener, and pulled his underwear back up.

In a flash he was dressed again, back in costume, ready to perform. No one could see it, no one could guess. He faked a smile in his mirror, raked a hand through his curls, and tried to pretend nothing happened.

And he was back out there before the show was back on again.

***

"Hey Rob?"

"What is it, Walls?"

"Want to glitter bomb Artemis and Zatanna's rooms?"

He grinned. "Settle the score, baby. Let's go."

***

Wally knew moving onto his arms too was a mistake, but he couldn't care less right now. Summer had turned to fall turned to winter, and all the surfaces of his thighs were now covered in scars in their entireties. He couldn't even really cut them anymore, and have it be satisfying. He needed a completely new area.

So, as stereotypical and unsafe as it was... He chose his forearms. The skin there was soft, it wasn't really something that was come into contact with a lot, and he usually wore long sleeves anyway, even in civvies. This was fine.

And it was still hidden by his costume. 

What wasn't hidden so well by his costume, though, was his dad. Things had been getting worse. His job had been laying people off. Thankfully his dad kept the job, but... They cut his pay, so things were tense. So he was drinking more. And when he was drinking, he was a lot angrier. 

And it was getting a little hard to hide, sometimes.

Wally was staring at himself in the mirror, trying to dab at a swollen black eye with some concealer. If his connection with the speedforce would just kick in this could work, but it wouldn't, so it just looked, well...

It just looked like a badly swollen black eye with and poorly applied concealer on it. 

Which, of course, was exactly when his door had to open. Wally immediately jumped, covering his eye, shoving the concealer off his desk, but...

Artemis just cocked her hip. "Wally, what are you doing?"

"Uh..."

He was standing there, one hand behind his back holding the tube of concealer, the other covering his eye, looking suspicious as all get out.

"...nothing?"

She rolled her eyes, closing the door behind her. "Let me see that eye."

"No!"

"Let me see it."

"It's, uh, fine?"

"Wally," Artemis sighed, reaching up and pulling the hand away from his eye. "Don't pretend I don't know, okay?"

Wally's heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest. "Know what?"

"Well, I can at least guess." She clarified. "But... From one trans kid with an awful dad to another... I know what it's like."

And just like that, his whole body went still. "My dad isn't... That bad."

"He did... Something to you, didn't he?"

"Well... Yeah. But he was drunk."

"Wally," Artemis grabbed a tissue, dabbing away the messy concealer. "That's not an excuse."

"It's just-" he sucked in a deep breath, then shook his head. "Normally, with my healing factor, it would be gone by now, it's just taking a bit."

She nodded. "Need me to help you cover it?"

"Please?"

Gently, with the most care Wally had ever seen her use, Artemis covered the black eye. It wasn't perfect, since it was swollen, but... It was much better.

"Thank you, Arty." He whispered when she was done, putting on his goggles. "See? No one can even tell."

Artemis forced a smile. "You should tell someone, Walls. Your uncle, at least. You don't have to do this."

"No, I mean, I... It's not that bad."

"It's that bad. You deserve safety, okay?" She sighed, ruffling his hair. "Now, I promised Raquel I would make the eggnog for tomorrow. So... Hang in there, Wally."

And with that, he left, leaving him standing alone in his room, frozen in place.

***

Dick had all of the evidence he needed. Yes, looking back on it, there were ways he could have done this that would have been less creepy, or less invasive. It wasn't exactly... The best way he could have proven everything.

But when he had gotten the suspicion that his best friend was being abused by his parents, he wasn't thinking about the cleanest way to prove things. He was thinking about the fastest way to get Wally out of that house.

So he... Might have set up cameras. Which was hard, because they only got certain angles, certain shots. And with Wally's connection to the speedforce it was hard to have any proof of injury because bruises faded so damn quickly.

But, even under goggles, with concealer on, there was no doubt he was sporting a black eye at the Young Justice Holiday Party. There was photo evidence, proof that was the date those photos were taken, and proof of when the black eye was given to him... Among other things. He had everything all lined up.

Now... If that was the only thing that he had uncovered.

Dick kept flip flopping as he worked on this case. Could he call it a case? Technically that's what it was; he worked cases like this sometimes, but... Still. This was his best friend he was watching on the tapes. This was his drunk father he was listening to. 

This was all too real.

All of his cases were, but...

And it was even more disturbing to think about that, by all indication, this had been going on for years. And he'd never noticed. It hurt. To know that, if one too many things hadn't seemed right, he never would have caught this. None of them would have. 

He was going to tell Wally about it before he told Barry, to give him the option first, but... There was something else on one of the tapes.

It wasn't one hundred percent sure. It could be a note written in red pen or a doodle or something - the cameras were small and that compromised some quality - but there was something red on his arm under his sleeve.

And if, on top of everything else, Wally had been hurting himself too? Dick didn't know what he would do with himself.

But right now he needed to get traught and deal with the situation, no matter how much it broke his heart.

***

Wally pushed a hand through his hair. It was getting a little bit long, but he was getting too lazy to cut it, these days. Between the weight he had been losing, the bruises on his skin, the cuts all up and down his thighs and wrists...

He looked like a mess, with the bags under his eyes and pale skin, collarbones and ribs sticking out a little too far, scars layered too heavy. After his wrists were covered he went back to his hips where he started, going over old scars, reopening old wounds.

Only at Mount Justice did he use the flimsy little pencil sharpener anymore; at home he nabbed a box cutter that was far more effective.

And the weird thing was, he didn't even know why.

It all just traced back to a night before he had become Kid Flash, when he was questioning himself, and he dug his nails into his hips in frustration.

And he liked it.

So he kept doing it.

The objects just got sharper and sharper until he was standing here, six years later, still hiding it. No one knew. No one needed to know.

It was hidden under his suit, so it was fine. It was all just... Fine.

***

"Hey, Wally, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Hrrmp?" Wally sat up straight, mouth full of pancakes; he swallowed. "Yeah, gimme a sec."

Quickly as he could, he shoveled the rest of his breakfast into his mouth, washing it all down with a glass of milk.

"What is it, Rob?"

"I need to talk to you... In private."

Wally's heart was racing. Was that good? Was that bad? The look on Rob's face could go either way.

"Sure. Lead the way, Boy Wonder."

Following Robin's leading, they ducked into a back room away from everyone else. He did say in private, but... The empty room was just adding to his anxiety, as well as the way Robin was chewing on his lip.

He only did that when he was nervous. Like, really nervous. Talking about coming out to Batman nervous. Admitting that he messed up nervous.

"Wally, I know about your parents."

And everything came crashing down. Wally felt frozen in place, everything he had built up internally broken down, fallen apart with just those little words.

"...what do you mean?" He choked out, trying to control his breathing.

"Don't pretend you don't know, Wall." Robin sighed, looking down at the ground. "I... Look, I'm not pretending it was okay for me to snoop as much as I did-"

Of course he did. This was Robin, who hacked everything. Robin, who always dug deeper and deeper until he found the truth, no matter how ugly. Robin, who never quite knew when too far was too far.

"Okay. You know." Wally cut him off. "So does Artemis. I'll... It's only when he's drunk, though."

"Wally, that... I wanted to tell you, so that you could have the opportunity to tell your uncle if you wanted to."

And this was Robin, so he knew what that meant. "Or you'll tell him for me?"

He bit his lip. "Wally, I... I love you. I don't want you to get hurt."

The way way he said it.

The way he said, 'I love you,' hurt so badly, something about it this time just made Wally's chest ache.

He opened his mouth to say something, but...

Robin reached up and took off his sunglasses, then met Wally's eyes.

He was right about everything. They were dark, but he could still see how they would twinkle with mischief. His eyes were soft and caring and beautiful and welling up with tears.

Only one thing: they were a dark, ocean blue.

"Wally, I need you to be honest with me." Robin spoke softly, taking one of his hands in both of his own. "Have you been hurting yourself?"

Robin: greatest teen detective.

"Pfft, no. Why would you say that?" Wally lied, glancing away. "Come on, Rob, just because-"

"Dick."

Freeze frame. "What?"

"No, not you, that's my name." He clarified, squeezing Wally's hand. "Dick Grayson."

"But, dude! Your secret identity! Won't Batman kill you?"

Robin - Dick - shook his head. "He'll understand. I'm being honest with you right now. Now Wally, please tell me you haven't been hurting yourself."

"I just did..."

"Then show me your wrists."

And in those five words, Wally's whole body went cold. Did he do it? Did he not do it? What options did he even have?

He sucked in a deep breath. "You... Won't like what's there."

Dick's face fell. "How long?"

Wally swallowed. "Longer than you've known me."

"Can I hug you?"

And he realized that, of all the five years he had known Robin, Dick, whatever he wanted to call him, he could probably count the number of times he cried on one hand. And here he was, voice cracking, tears starting to stream down his cheeks. 

"Yeah," He choked out, and immediately his arms were latched on. 

"I love you," Dick's voice was muffled by his shirt. "I love you, Wally West."

"I'm fine, Robbie." Wally whispered into his hair. "I'm alright."

But he still didn't let him go.

***

It was hard to get used to. Things were changing around so much, and... Wally had to admit, he still didn't feel like anything had relaxed yet.

He was the one who told his uncle. Well, he told Aunt Iris. And she was furious. Not at him for not telling her, but... Needless to say, within a little time and with the evidence Robin had put together, he was living with his aunt and uncle.

That part was strange: living in a house where they understood how much he needed to eat. Wally still wasn't used used to that, he was self-limiting and holding back and catching himself falling into all of the same old habits, but... They were working on it.

Aunt Iris, Uncle Barry, and Artemis when she found out, all agreed that he was not allowed to wear a binder in costume. But... They found a couple compression tops that worked well enough, while being designed with activity in mind, so... That wasn't too bad.

Even if his 'pecs' were just looking a little more out there. They didn't look that unnatural, especially with the re-enforced shoulder on his costume.

Scratch that. It really did look natural. He just... Had to get used to it.

Just like he had to get used to calling Robin 'Dick.' Weird. He told the whole team, too. Only that part of the whole thing though, thankfully.

But then, at the end of the day, after all of the changes and the ups and downs... He was missing his coping mechanism. It was awful. Wally had always laughed at people when they called self-harm an addiction; it never felt that way to him. It was just something that he did to feel okay. To feel calm again. But now...

That had to be one of the hardest parts, but when he pictured Robin- Dick, fuck- crying again? He had to convince himself to at least try.

And yeah, he fucked up a few times. It wasn't easy. But... No one said it was.

So, all in all, Wally was... Adjusting. Making it through, doing his best. He'd get there, one of these days.

***

"Hey, Wally, I... Have something to tell you."

"What is it, Dickie-bird?"

He managed an awkward smile. "In private?"

"Oh no." Wally shook his head, still smiling. "I know what kinda stuff comes from that."

"It's not... Just come with me, you weirdo."

He frowned. "You okay?"

It had been three months since the whole confrontation had gone down, and things were... Definitely not normal by any stretch of the imagination, but... Getting there. 

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine." Dick faked an awful smile. "Whelmed."

"Dude, you don't sound whelmed."

"Just..." He glanced around. "Is anyone here?"

Wally shook his head. "Nope. Kaldur, Connor, and Raquel were all selected by the League to help out on that super top secret mission thing."

"Yeah, I remember that one."

"M'gann has cheer practice." He added.

"Yep."

"And Zatanna and Artemis are... Canoodling."

"That again?" Dick raised an eyebrow. "That's what you say every time."

"Well that's what they're doing." Wally shrugged. "Every. Time."

He laughed. "If you weren't gay, I'd call you a pervert."

"There's nothing sexual about a good pure canoodling."

And that just got Dick to laugh harder. "Alright, alright-"

"Okay. Enough about canoodling. What were you going to say?"

Wally's heart was racing. What was he going to say? What could he add on top of all of this craziness? 

"I didn't want to mention it too soon, and you can tell me if I did, but..." He trailed off. "The fact of the matter is, I haven't been entirely honest with you."

Wally blinked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean..." Dick took a deep breath. "I love you."

He rolled his eyes. "I know that, you tell me all the time, Rob."

"As more than friends."

And once again, it was like everything froze; but this time it was just his heart skipping a beat.

"You what?"

Dick winced. "I really really like you? Does that sound too much like a kid? I was trying to sound cool and whelmed about it, but it's hard when-"

Wally crushed him in a hug, spinning him around. "You're saying - all this time - you've liked me liked me? And you never said anything?"

"No?" He squeaked.

"You bastard! I love you!"

"Wally!" 

He paused. "What?"

"You're squeezing me too tightly!"

"Oh! Sorry!" Wally set him back down, letting go. "But seriously you- how- I-"

Then the reality of the situation set in. Everything Dick didn't know. His smile faded.

"I just love you, Wally." Dick said with a shrug, as casually as he ever did.

He swallowed. "Before you... Before you decide that, give me a minute."

"What do you mean, Walls?"

"Just... Just let me show you, okay?" 

Palms sweating, he led him to his room. This was it. All he wanted, Duck to feel that way about him, but... It wasn't fair to him not to know. Not to see. So...

"Dick, I'm... You know what I've done. To myself, I mean."

"Yeah." Dick nodded, wandering across the room and sitting down on the bed. "And? Like that makes a difference to me?"

Wally swallowed. "You should see me first, at least. I'm not... I'm not pretty, Dick. I don't look good."

"Wally, that's not how I see it."

Shaking his head, Wally turned around, and in a flash, was out of his costume.

He was expecting him to gasp. He wasn't expecting him to be angry because he knew him too well for that, but he knew that, after seeing what he looked like under the costume, he wouldn't want to be with him.

Because he hadn't gained back all that weight, even after that long. The bruises were faded and gone, but he still felt like they were there some days. And while most of the cuts were old now, there were obvious places where he relapsed.

Where he failed. 

But Dick didn't gasp. He didn't shy away. He just... Shrugged.

Wally tipped his head to the side, perplexed, wracking his brain to figure out what Dick was thinking. Why wasn't he freaking out? Why wasn't he disappointed? Why hadn't he reacted like everyone else?

"But... Isn't it worse than you thought?"

He sighed, slowly standing back up. "Wally... Yeah, it makes me upset to see what you did to yourself, but... That doesn't make me not love you."

"These are recent, though. I haven't even-" Tears were welling up in Wally's eyes now. "I haven't even stopped all the way, you know that?"

"But you're trying." Dick countered, taking his hands in his. "And that's what counts, okay? You'll never convince me not to love you, alright?"

"Never?"

He smiled, leaning up to kiss Wally on the cheek. "Never."

"...now it's all awkward, me standing here in my underwear."

Dick laughed. "I could strip down too, if you wanted."

Wally just waggled his eyebrows.

"Was that a bit of fifteen-year-old, still pretending to be heterosexual Wally I just saw there?"

"Nope." He leaned in, kissing Dick on the cheek. "It's fully seventeen, definitely okay with being gay Wally. And... You can keep your clothes on. Just a minute-" In a flash, he was back in his own clothes. "So... You still...?"

"Yeah, I still love you."

"I'm not sure how to process that." Wally admitted, blushing wildly.

Dick laughed. "Neither am I."

"So... Since everyone's busy..."

"Mario Kart?"

"Dick Grayson, you just about read my mind."

**Author's Note:**

> I know what some of y'all are thinking: Ted, you hurt a lot of trans guys in your fics, what the fuck?
> 
> Well, buckle up, because studies have shown that most trans teens have, in fact, self harmed in some way. And that's horrific to me, as one of them. So, if you're trans or not, if you're in that place if you're thinking about hurting yourself, if you've already done it, if you're like me seeking out this content to read instead of actually physically hurting yourself-
> 
> You're not alone, and if you need someone to talk to, I'm here, alright?
> 
> Love you <3
> 
> And my normal notes:
> 
> Oneshot requests are tentatively open!
> 
> Tumblr is Supertinybats and Supertinywords-
> 
> Comments are love <3


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